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Archive for the ‘the funny’ Category

That’s not my department

In politics, talkies, the funny on March 23, 2010 at 9:46 pm

Far from being a Nazi, rocket scientist Werner von Braun was a keen lover of children’s entertainment! The two are completely mutually exclusive! Hitler hated Mickey! And how could Walt be a Nazi, making a movie where a sweet Aryan princess co-habits with a group of big-nosed diamond miners? Oy!

“ixnay on the azinay, Walt”

“Right you are, SS-Sturmbannf├╝hrer.”

Tom Lehrer’s stuff seems kind of sour and mean-spirited to me these days, but he could still make a good point:

Because I didn’t want to get any spit on me

In talkies, the funny on March 20, 2010 at 11:31 am

It’s Carl Reiner’s birthday. Carl Reiner’s still alive? Yes! He’s 87. Who’s Carl Reiner?

He’s probably most famous as Mel Brooks’ straight man in the 2000 Year Old Man sketch, but here he is being a genius on the Smothers Brothers Show. Yeah, it’s corny ethnic humour, but, you know – feel the width…

Oh, and he directed The Jerk:

Happy Birthday, Carl.

In Memory of Richard Marsland 1976 – 2008

In the funny on December 6, 2009 at 2:54 pm

How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

In the funny on August 10, 2006 at 3:36 pm

Two.

One to change the bulb…

And a second one to hold the ladder.

Thank you, and goodnight.

exeunt

Hinch Rumour Denied

In other, pretends, the funny on May 28, 2005 at 4:59 pm

Family and friends of the late radio announcer, Derryn Hinch, are said to be “sickened” by claims emerging today that Hinch was a fair and conscientious journalist.

“Nothing could be further from the truth” insisted 3AW stablemate, Neil Mitchell. “Behind the public image Derryn was identical to his public image. He really was a pompous attention-seeker. In fact, his great – his only – legacy to journalism in Australia down the years was to lower the standard for the rest of us. Having to live up to his lazy, but profitable, muck-raking example has made every reporter’s job that much easier: It’s all that’s expected of us.”

Mitchell acknowledged that the less observant members of the public who started the rumour could have been misled by Hinch’s frequent talk of a journalist’s responsibility to the truth, and by his insistence that he wasn’t simply out to attract listeners with his outrageous and offensive comments.

“But no-one who knew him could seriously accuse Derryn of giving a stuff about silly abstractions like Truth and Humility,” Mitchell said. “No, I mean, he even wasted his dying breath demanding a state funeral and insisting that Douglas Wood is guilty. An extraordinary cockache of a man, right to the very end.”

Another shocking rumour, about Hinch’s alleged sexual predilection for pre-pubescent Vietnamese boys, was greeted with shrugs by close friends.

“How do you think he got the hep B?” said one ex-wife and drinking partner. “It was an open secret for decades that Derryn had a taste for “Saigon Chicken” as he liked to call it – I mean, them. Any Saturday night you could find him down one or another dark alley in Footscray, balls deep in a twelve year old and holding a bag of glue over the kid’s face. He didn’t like them to struggle, you see. Effort wasn’t Derryn’s way, really, in any aspect of his life, personal or professional. Except when it came to keeping his dungeon stocked – I mean, wine cellar.”
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This post was a response to Hinch’s spurious claim that Graham Kennedy had died of AIDS, made before his body was even cold. It had been an open secret for decades that Kennedy was gay, but Hinch treated it like he had a scoop. Well, he did, but it wasn’t a scoop of news – 19/3/10